143638

Joke of the Day

"Q: Why were there two presidential limousines in the inaugural parade? A: The first one held the real president while the second one contained the president's spouse Bill Clinton."

"i just want someone to love me as much as sean penn loves haiti"

"The grown up version of Tetris is loading a full dishwasher."

"Two dyslexics are walking down the street... ""Can you smell dog shit?"" asks the first. ""I can't even smell my own name"" replies the other"

"Facial scrubs with bits of fruit in them are a pretty big ""fuck you!"" to third world countries."

"Nickelback's career is dead... They are more washed up than a Syrian toddler."

"Drunk Welsh man walks into a bar A drunk welsh man walks into a bar. How many women are pregnant at the end of the night? None, but I wouldn't eat the lamb!"

"What's purple and sequels? A skinned baby in a bag of salt. *squeals"

"It's not that hard to tell alligators and crocodiles apart. One will see you after a while, and the other will see you later."

"What do you call a Nun in a Wheelchair? Virgin Mobile."