143292

Joke of the Day

"A lady never reveals her penis"

Next Joke
 
"A girl wants to go to the concert... She asked her dad for his permission, and he said, ""no, but you can buy the album, and that's vinyl."""
"If these seasonal allergies don't kill me, that person I just sneezed all over probably will."
"If there's a sock on my doorknob... It means I'm having sex with the other one."
"[gestures to the parents of a crying baby] shhhh, please. my foot's asleep"
"My dog and I are just drivin around, listenin to music and OMG DOG DO YOU EVEN HAVE A LICENSE? PAWS AT 10 AND 2. DO NOT FOLLOW THAT SQUIRREL"
"I had a dream that I was fighting Jason Bourne, Will Hunting and Tom Ripley Thanks to months of therapy, I'm finally battling my Damons."
"What does a neckbeard call his imaginary girlfriend and his disease? Ma'lady"
"Waiter there's a fly in my soup! Surely not sir. It must be one of those vitamin bees you hear so much about."
"Two doe walk out of a casino... One looks at the other and says, ""I can't believe I blew 50 bucks."""