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Joke of the Day

"6yo:You can't eat chips before dinner! Me:YOU can't. I'm a grown man. I do what I want. *Wife walks in*: What's that? Me:WHAT? NOTHING. Huh?"

"The bus carrying the Chinese tourists crashed. It hit a language barrier."

"I will never forget where I was when I heard the news that JFK was shot. (8th grade history class)"

"A man sends 10 puns to a pun contest in hopes that at least one of them would be selected as the winning entry No pun in ten did."

"Mayweather Vs Pacquiao A fight ? That's a laugh .... I've had tougher fights getting my kids to take their baths!!"

"I wish I could play little league again. I'd be so much better now."

"Pavlov is sitting at a pub enjoying a pint; the phone rings,and he jumps up shouting: ""Oh Shit, I forgot to feed the dog!"""

"I like to think of myself not so much as a terrible driver, but an awesome stunt woman."

"Don't worry if you are spending the Christmas all alone because everyone will eventually die xD"

"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? She choked"