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Joke of the Day

"A man attempting to piss in public is apprehended by a police officer... The officer asks him, ""Sir, do you realize this is against the law?"" The man replies, ""No, sir, it's against the wall."""

"If I had all the money, I would pay people to sneak up behind you and blast a bullhorn right before you hit send on a political tweet."

"What do you fire from underwater guns? Seashells"

"DUI checkpoint cop: sir, have u been drinking tonight me: define sir"

"What dog has money? A bloodhound because he is always picking up scents (cents)."

"What did the English man say when he walked in on his wife making love to three men? 'Ello, 'ello, 'ello!"

"Tests are like jokes... You just gotta get through them, and sometimes you find out they're not that bad! And other times you have cancer."

"Most disgusting joke I know ... [NSFW] So, I was eating out my girlfriend when all of a sudden I tasted horse sperm. I couldn't help but shout out ""aha grandmother, so that's how you died!""."

"I broke my finger last week On the other hand, I am okay."

"My daughter just said that I'm the best dad she's ever had. So I got that going for me."