141414

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the French Olympic race walker who pooped his pants mid race? At least he didn't oui in them too."

"Life is like a dozen roses... it's full of pricks!"

"Do you know the difference between a cheeseburger and a blowjob? (No- what?) Want to get lunch sometime?"

"I've only taught my parrot to say ""REPETITION"" so far. Next I'm going to teach him to say ""IRONY AND ANNOYING ARE SYNONYMS"". ""SQUAWK!"""

"Why did the fallen child cross the road? Believing that one day, the chicken will cross the road, it fills you with determination."

"Hey [STOP] Got your voicemail earlier [STOP] I'm replying with a telegram because you're apparently a big fan of outdated technology [STOP]"

"Next time you over hear a stranger giving out their number. Text them details of what they are wearing. It's so fun to watch them freak out!"

"Alexander Godunov Is Alexander a good dancer?"

"Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey had kids together... But the children were clones of Mr. Grey because he had all the dominant genes."

"Anti jokes A man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is destroying his family."