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Joke of the Day

"For lent, I'm going to give up sexual innuendos but it's hard... so hard!"

"Here's a funny joke I heard about pizza oh nevermind. It's too cheesy."

"I don't understand how a cemetery can raise its funeral prices and blame it on the cost of living."

"A broom only likes one brand of comedy. Dustpan."

"I carry a knife whenever I'm running late to work because that's what Counterstrike taught me: ""You always run faster with a knife""."

"People who push and shove to get on a flight before other passengers are possibly going to get to their end destination one second faster."

"Did you know that the idea of recycling actually came about from a group of pirates? They came up with the idea of the four R's."

"How many Mexicans does it take to build a... Oh, wait, they're done."

"Dreading going to gym. It's kinda late. Open 24hrs, tho. Hey, you know who else is open 24hrs? McDonalds. Yeah. I'm going to McDonald's."

"TIL The U.S is #18 in Mathematics worldwide. At least we're in the top 10."