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Joke of the Day

"'Here's a good book' said the sales assistant in the book shop to Mrs Monster. 'How To Help Your Husband Get Ahead.' 'No thank you' said Mrs Monster. 'My husband's got two heads already. . .'"

"What does Sigmund Freud say comes between fear and sex? funf (it helps if you say it out loud, and understand German) :-)"

"I was gonna tell you a joke so funny you'd laugh your dick off... but it looks like you already heard it."

"Whenever someone talks to me, I freak out because I forget people can see me."

"What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver? A golfer goes, Whack! Damn! And a skydiver go Damn! Whack!"

"What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in common? They can smell it but they can't eat it."

"What is Captain Picard's favorite Chinese takeout ? Make it Tso!"

"The Bible TL;DR"

"Why are the Ninja Turtles on the No-Fly list? Because they are members of an underground Splinter cell."

"I used to drink all brands of beer. Now, I am older Budweiser!"