140833

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the 2 Dish antennas that fell in love and got married? The service was terrible but the reception was OK when it wasn't raining."

"Life with me is like a roller coaster. There's a weight limit."

"Terrifying to think that one puff of marijuana can transform your life into a carnival of lies & ultimately, murder."

"Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet? Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!"

"Literally no one wants to be on the phone with you less than the lady who answers the phone at a Chinese restaurant."

"What a kid I got I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. 'creds: Rodney Dangerfield'"

"""What do we want?!"" ""TIME TRAVEL!"" ""When do we want it?!"" ""IRRELEVANT!"""

"What does a farsighted gynecologist have in common with a puppy dog? They both got a wet nose."

"What is it called when an unborn baby dies in a horse-drawn sleigh? A mis-carriage"

"What Do You Call 4 Mexicans In Quicksand? Cuatro Cinco!"