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Joke of the Day
"Women are like cars. We want the ones that look AND work the best, but none of us have the money."
Next Joke
"The last time I saw my friend Peter he was counting. ""75, 76, 77..."" he said, as he began to walk away. I don't know what he's up to now."
"If you're a couple who sit on the same side of the booth, I'mma slide into the empty seat and eat your fries. Stop creeping everyone out."
"Just watched two of my kids try and fail to open a cereal box so I've concluded that playing Mozart during pregnancy is bullshit."
"My favorite music genre is a refined form of rock... Metal"
"Did you hear the one about premature ejaculation? Too soon, man."
"Q: What do you call a weapon used by a Canadian ninja? A: Canuck-chucks."
"I just got a job cleaning air ducts and I don't like it very much, but at least I have a job. Thanks for letting me vent."
"""nooooooo!!!"" - 20 yr old me seeing how much weed 35 yr old me brushes onto the floor to get ready for company"
"I'm friend with 25 letter of the alphabet... I don't know why... -Chris Turner"