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Joke of the Day

"confucius say when you take old hooker to all you can eat seafood you walk away with a big bag of crabs"

"What do you call the 72 virgins that Allah gave isis? Goats"

"9 out of 10 dentists recommend crest pro health... The other one is killing a lion"

"If a female fighter pilot shoots down a lot of enemy airplanes, she might plausibly be called a heroine. But if she shoots up a lot of heroin, she will probably not be called an enemy airplane."

"Why is Oklahoma so windy? Because Texas sucks and Kansas blows"

"Where did Suzy go when the bombs fell? Everywhere."

"Ok doc, give it to me straight. ""It's cancer"" How bad? ""Really bad, you have 2 months."" OMG ""APRIL FOOLS!"" Whew- ""You have 2 days."""

"How can you tell if the code is broken? (SW Engineering joke) If India worked on it"

"This lesbian couple I'm friends with couldn't afford the double-headed dildo they wanted. They're really struggling to make ends meet."

"Cop: You know why I pulled you over sir? Me: Because you suck at finding rapists, murders, molesters, thieves, and arsonists?"