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Joke of the Day

"the series finale of Game of Thrones will be the camera pulling back & revealing it was a snowglobe and the owner is watching sports instead"

"A blind man walks into a bar... And hits his head."

"Telling people my costume is Obama's birth certificate. If they say I have no costume, I fucking explain the facts to that racist fuckbag."

"What kind of bees eat brains? Zombees"

"Sometimes you have to end a relationship because of the way they chew."

"Did you hear about the joke about the broken pencil? Well, there-- Nevermind, it's pointless."

"What do you call a Mexican on a hill? Gracias."

"I love kids. When they're adults."

"Testing /u/trollabot no comments"

"I didn't have a headache until you pulled your pants down."