13888

Joke of the Day

"WIFE: Hey why are all our potatoes dressed in tiny outfits and arranged in a little scene? ME: [hiding Photato Album] Why? Do you like it?"

"20 Years Ago... 20 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash, and Bob Hope. And now, we have no jobs, no cash, and no hope"

"[walking away from taco truck] WIFE: whats wrong ME: nothing WIFE: did u think the truck would be one giant taco ME: *wiping away tears* no"

"What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow? You can't milk a cow for 15 years"

"Why do rappers make bad carpenters? Because they measure 5.5 to 6 inches as 8 to 13 inches."

"How do Polish dogs get bumps on their heads? Chasing parked cars."

"Send a guy to the grocery store without a list, and you deserve whatever you get."

"A blonde is taking money out of an ATM, when the blonde behind her in line says, ""Ha! Ha! I know your password. It's four asterisks."" The first blonde replies, ""Ha! Ha! No it's not. It's 3862."""

"My friend just fucked his 14 year old escort. So, does anyone here know how to fix a 2002 Ford? It's pretty messed up from the event."

"What do you get if you cross Prince Phillip and The Queen? Killed in a car crash."