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Joke of the Day

"Diarrhea must be hereditary Because it runs in your jeans."

"Going through life totally ignorant must be the only way to find true happiness."

"Astronaut: *takes a picture of the moon* Moon: delete it"

"Officer: ""didn't you know that sleeping in your car on the side of the road is illegal ?"" Me: ""yes I did officer. But this isn't my car"""

"B2.... or not B2... That might be the number. --Shakespearean Bingo Caller"

"Roses are red, violets are blue.... does this rag smell like chloroform to you? ,"

"ME: judging by this blood stain the murderer appears to have been a turkey ACTUAL POLICE OFFICER: That's a hand print"

"Asked to switch seats. I wanted to switch seats on the plane last week because of a crying baby. The stewardess said no... just because it was my baby"

"The hardest part about having an ugly child is lying to them when they ask you if you love them."

"What do you call a mountain of puns? Mount Cleverest"