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Joke of the Day
"Having sex while camping is so amazing it's ***In-Tents***"
Next Joke
"GUY: are u doing the mannequin challenge? ME: [standing perfectly still w/ awkward facial expression] no this is just how I am around people"
"*Wife sends me a link* *I click on link* *Buy whatever's at the link* *wait for delivery* ~Christmas shopping for my wife"
"I invited Jim for dinner ""Jim from church or Jim who travels everywhere by catapult?"" [Loud thud on the roof] *sigh* ""I'll get the ladders"""
"ASIAN KIDS: Do they make you ride through the X-ray machine at the airport since your minds are basically computers?"
"You know what a vegetarian will never get? A Spam."
"Home is not where you live, but where they understand you."
"Fat lady hops on an Exercycle next to me, she says, ""I'm here to lose weight."" Me: ""And you waited 'til the last min, didn't you?"""
"I like to steal pictures of people's breakfast and post them again I guess you could say I'm a cereal reposter"
"What does a flame smell like? Burnt nose hair."