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Joke of the Day
"So the past, present, and future walk into a bar. It gets really tense."
Next Joke
"I have a cut on my leg Doc ""Yeah that legs gotta go sir"" But its a tiny cut ""Sorry, I cant save it"" *sharks fake doctor outfit falls off*"
"Santa keeps his suits in the clauset."
"That awkward moment when your friends are singing ""happy birthday to you"" and you don't know where to look."
"Give me your best ""Why don't you make like a _______ and _______."""
"People with private Twitter accounts should know that withholding their tweets is like not letting us talk to their toddler on the phone."
"I learned all I need to know about how to treat my coworkers by watching every Saw movie at least ten times."
"I once told a girl to text me when she gets home She must have been homeless"
"Why chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side."
"What do you get when you combine a pun and a rhetorical question?"