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Joke of the Day

"What do you get if you cross a labrador and a tortoise ? A dog that will run to the shop to get your paper and bring back last weeks paper !"

"what do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Hellifikno"

"At least there's one other woman who's more wasted than me in this emergency room. No, my mistake, she's got dementia."

"Why is Easter like whipped cream and a cherry? Because it's always on a sundae!"

"Here's one myfriend's little sister told me. Why can't you hear the pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the ""p"" is silent."

"When playing The Telephone Game, I like to whisper to the next person, ""I'm going to kill you,"" and then nod and smile encouragingly."

"My head is so big... When a girl sits on my face, she has room for the remote and a snack."

"[NSFW]A more honest retelling of John F. Kennedy's famous quote on lunar exploration. ""We choose to go to the moon, and Marilyn Monroe's bedroom, because it is easy and because I am hard."" JFK - 1961."

"How do you suffocate a redneck? Tape his mouth shut."

"It's cute how my boss called the plastic container on my desk a ""water bottle."" Yeah, that's the clear liquid I keep in there."