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Joke of the Day

"I don't approve of political jokes I have seen too many of them get elected."

"I heard it's a good night to see the Perseid meteor shower . . . . . . but I haven't heard how it got dirty."

"What did the elevator say to the stairs? Never mind, I'll escalator"

"Did you hear about the sly woodlands creature that was killed for his fur? He went from a cunning stoat to a stunning coat"

"Why doesn't snake have balls? Because he would look like a dick."

"My GPA.. My GPA is the square root of -16. An imaginary 4.0"

"TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public."

"A guy walked into a bar... He said ow."

"Girl: Did you like that cake Mrs Jones? Mrs Jones: Yes very much. Girl: That's funny. My mom said you didn't have any taste."

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? You ever try to jelly it in her ass?"