137453

Joke of the Day

"Why do strippers hate roofers? They always pay in shingles."

"Hipster Jokes How does the hipster have an orgasm? ""I came like so long ago"" Why do hipsters hate rivers? They are too mainstream How much weed does a hipster usually smoke? An Instagram"

"When I die, I hope I have enough time to point at a complete stranger and whisper ""You did this."""

"I'm thinking about opening a veterinary clinic for female dogs with broken legs. Gonna call it ""Bitches Be Trippin"""

"What do all men at single's bars have in common? They're married."

"What's a feminists least favorite Pokemon? Abra!"

"What does one dog say to the other when he just broke up with his girl friend? Go and retrieve her!"

"Does eating fish makes you dumb? We know that eating fish is supposed to make us ""smarter"", but the only fishes we eat, are the ones ""dumb"" enough to get caught. It doesn't make sense."

"I was so tired during Hunger Games, I was nodding as much as Phillip Seymour Hoffman"

"Found an old Tom Jones CD and my underwear drawer flew wide open and all my undies threw themselves at my stereo."