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Joke of the Day

"What's a pirate's favourite letter? You'd think ""R"", but his first love be the ""C""."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill so jack could lick her candy... But Jack got a shock And a mouth full of cock Cause Jill's real name was Randy"

"whenever a song says put your hands in the air i do it on the spot. i have fun and also an alarming vehicle collision record"

"What did Bill say to Hillary after sex? ""I'll be home in 20 minutes."""

"How can you tell if a pedophile is happy? He has a peda-smile."

"My three-year-old daughter said to me, ""You should go back to college to learn more about being nice."""

"Why did Mickey leave Minnie? Because she was fucking goofy."

"What's the difference between a weasel and a stoat? One's weasily recognised - the other's stoatally different"

"I just burned 2000 calories! That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven and take a nap."

"""Bartender, see that brunette at the end of the bar? I'd like you to bring her a slice of your finest ham."""