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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't the dyslexic plantation owner get anything done? Gingers just don't last in the sun."

"ok sir guacamole is gonna be an extra $1.80 plus the rights to sacrifice your soul to the dark lord satan thank u for choosing chipotle"

"I was about to be given a yellow card for punching another player in the face, but then the ref noticed I was an amputee. No arm, no foul."

"I wore a pedometer for a week. Good news -- I'm not a pedo."

"Pam: You blew me off for Katya, the big-titted cyborg! Little Miss...uhh... Archer: R2-""Double-D""-2?"

"A pirate walks into a bar... The bartender looks up and says ""Do you know you have a steering wheel sticking out of your butt?"" The pirate responds, ""Yarrr, its driving me nuts."""

"Who takes the most drugs? The police."

"How do you win a superbowl without cheating? I don't know, I'm a Patriots fan"

"How do 5 gay men walk? One Direction!"

"If a tramp and a bunch of rich people are dressed the same, how does the tramp stand out? He begs to differ."