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Joke of the Day

"Why is Darth Vader black? Because he left his son."

"What did the cat say when I shut him in the refridgerator? I don't know, I couldn't hear him through the door."

"I want to start a subreddit about erectile dysfunction, but I seem to be having a hard time getting it up."

"I dream of a world where even lactose is tolerated by everyone."

"Who the patron saint of surveillance? St Francis of a CCTV."

"A Jewish boy asks his dad for $50 His dad then asks, ""$30? What do you need $20 for?!?"""

"I'm not a doctor, but I play one on eHarmony."

"Every single person on this subway is staring at their phone and I'm so appalled I have to tweet about it."

"Welcome to Twitter - if you are not already following a mom who drinks wine one will be assigned to you."

"My paper towels went missing so I hired a Bounty hunter."