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Joke of the Day

"What's black and sits at the top of the stairs? Stephen Hawking in a house fire."

"What do you call a giant pile of kittens? A meowntain"

"Maybe we should put Obama on the $20 bill Then we would finally get the change he promised."

"Did you guys hear about the kidnapping in Jacksonvillle? He woke up."

"If this doughnut and chocolate milk are going to take years off my life, could I have them remove 1978-1982?"

"JonesTown Massacre Do you know why you never hear any jokes about the JonesTown Massacre? .......The punchline is too long!"

"If I were to make a glory hole... I would make it out of walnut."

"Girl on Facebook Heyy i have not seen u since high school. Me. It's been a while. Her. Yea been married 6 years now : ) Me. Unfriend"

"mob boss: stick his body in the compost pile me: wha mob boss (grabbing my collar intently): we might be killers, but u only got one earth"

"Why does everyone love Plato? Because he loved Dogs and he had two sons named Plato and Socrates"