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Joke of the Day

"I just bought a new computer... When i turned it on, instead of saying ""Welcome"", it said "" Hello"". It's a Dell."

"What do you call an obnoxious potato? A dictator."

"What kind of car does a pirate drive? Toyota YARis"

"I found out why amphibious cars never caught on. They were always getting toad."

"Just played Uno with my Mexican co-workers... ...they stole all the green cards."

"Everyday is a good day to walk through the forest, The fact that im dragging a dead body is completely irrelevant"

"Her: Let's go see 50 Shades of Grey Me: Tonight? Her: Yes [After the movie] Her: OMG that was so hot! Me: Mom, please just stop talking"

"Have you heard Adrian peterson used to play baseball? He might play for the twins this year. Apparently he is a switch hitter."

"What does Harry Potter say when he walks into a bar? I Expectsum Patronum"

"Why are there so few Mexican athletes in the Olympics? Because most of them who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States."