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Joke of the Day

"Paul walkers new movie.. The flat and the furious."

"wife: ""im sorry, he has to try everything before he buys it"" store owner: ""it's okay"" me: [lying in a coffin] ""the first one was better"""

"What do the Dallas Cowboys do when they win the Superbowl? Turn off their Nintendo and go to bed."

"I went to Seoul the other day to sell fluorescent markers. It was the highlight of my Korea."

"According to the Bible, what company was the first car manufacturer? Honda. Because Jesus and his apostles were in one accord."

"Why does Karl Marx like stormy days? There are no classes."

"I bet a lot of Seattle fans' wives had to order pizzas last night"

"The surprise in the Cracker Jacks box is Diabetes."

"I was an army sniper, until I was discharged. It must have been my accuracy. It was very hit and miss."

"A termite walks into a bar and asks... is the Bar Tender here?"