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Joke of the Day

"A guy is talking to his friend about his new girlfriend ""I did her up the arse on the first date"" the guy reveals proudly. ""no shit?"" His friend replies. ""nah, she had an enema beforehand"""

Next Joke
 
"The only thing harder than diamonds a redneck at his family reunion"
"Try to think of a world without hypotheticals. You can't."
"I accidentally broke my cat's ""best butt"" award. It was a catastrophe."
"What happened to the cow that jumped over the barbed wire fence? Udder destruction"
"What is the definition of masurbation? Coming unscrewed"
"What do you call a happy ending at a Jewish massage parlor? Free."
"What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? About halfway."
"Girl: I want bangs Me: I want a stylist to get my hair as close to antlers as possible. Make me look like a young prince of the wooded glen"
"[restaurant] ME: Do you have updog? WAITER: [sighs] No sir M: Ok, is this gluten free? W: No you have to pay for it M: Damn you're good"