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Joke of the Day

"A Chinese funeral parlor opened in my town. It's called ""Can you Bereave It"""

"Yelling ""Whore!"" in a public place and watching 15 girls turn around is pretty......... fun."

"As ice water runs down my face I conclude, ""Boy, you sure like to eat bread!"" is not a comment a lady on a dinner date enjoys hearing."

"""Knock knock"" If you hear knocking come from your screen then you definitely need to go and see an expert."

"Hear about the constipated mathematician? Worked his logs out with a pencil."

"I got sacked from the dodgems. I'm going to take them to court and win the case based on funfair dismissal."

"If you are single don't worry. Someone will come around shortly to totally fcuk that up."

"What does a mother use to keep her childrens' toenails soft and smooth? A pedi-file"

"My first wife was a great housekeeper. She kept both houses"

"Doctor Patient: Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a book Doctor: So what's your story?"