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Joke of the Day
"What's an activity 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape"
Next Joke
"Step 1 to help stop a baby choking Take your dick out its mouth"
"This cab driver is THE WORST. I keep telling him ""You passed my house, let me out"" & he's all like ""Sir I'm a cop and your under arrest for public nudity and intoxication."""
"So I'm not allowed near petting zoos... .. Or as I prefer to call them, heavy petting zoos."
"WIFE: I want u to be more spontaneous ME: ok [later] ME: *hides in closet with goalie mask on waiting for her to walk by*"
"[twirling my bra above my head like a helicopter and it gets stuck on the ceiling fan, im launched thru window into neighbors yard] me: hey"
"""bowl of chips"" 9 out of 10 voices in my head are telling me that I am too fat. The last one is calmly preparing a bowl of chips."
"A Jewish boy asks his Father... A Jewish boy asks his Father, ""Dad, can i have 50 pence please? His Father replies, ""40 pence! What do you want 30 pence for?"""
"was going to make a joke about science but I know for I wont get a reaction..."
"I hate how politically correct we have become as a society ... You can't even say black paint anymore. Now you have to say, ""Jamal kindly paint my house?"""