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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an Italian with two broken hands? Mute"

"sucks to be a bad guy in the teenage mutant ninja turtle world like ""who stopped u"" ""turtles"" ""huh"" ""no they were like faster than normal"""

"Really wanted the day off, so I texted my boss... ""What's the difference between this morning and your daughter?"" I'm not coming in this morning. (I got some time off now)"

"A double entendre is when I don't know what the hell you're saying. Twice."

"What is the difference between a whore and a bitch? A whore will have sex with anybody, a bitch will have sex with anybody except you."

"I sneezed real hard, and while I did not break any bones, I did sustain some tissue damage."

"What do you call a White Crocodile? A Crocasian"

"Funny school joke Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: who just threw that?! Boy: Me! I'm going home now."

"The Funniest Joke I Ever Heard Was... Post them in here. Honestly, off the top of your head, post the funniest joke you've ever heard. Whether it's very long, or a simple one-liner, share it!"

"What ringtone have you got? Murphy asked Paddy, ""What ringtone have you got?"" Paddy said, ""I've never really looked, but probably light brown"