134911

Joke of the Day

"""my favorite bon jovi song? oh its definitely the one where it sounds like a computer is trying to talk while burping"""

"Why did the toad become a lighthouse keeper? He had his own frog-horn."

"A growing number of parents are trying to force feed their children. Experts can offer no explanation. Citing, ""Even Master Jedi use spoons."""

"The last time Twitter was down I was forced to speak to real people. Real people go on and on and on and on, for way over 140 characters..."

"Officer! That guy threw sodium chloride at me! Police officer: That's a salt!"

"Quickly after robbing my bakery, a man got a severe headache Serves him right. It's not his grain, it's migraine"

"You look like my Asian friend from school. Yeah his name was Ug-lee!"

"Why did the orange stop in the middle of the road? It ran out of juice."

"Did you hear about the tornado that swept through the cemetery? Hundreds dead."

"Q: What is a blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears? A: She's trying to hold on to a thought."