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Joke of the Day

"How many Grateful Dead fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question. Deadheads screw in sleeping bags."

"Do you have any raisins? What about a date?"

"How many dead hookers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cause it's definitely not 4. My basement is still dark & I'm running out of room."

"How does the enthusiastic chef serve his burgers? With relish"

"no soap, radio."

"Who will Donald Trump blame when he loses the presidential bid? Of course every Juan!"

"A woman cries to her husband ""honey, the fridge isn't running"" Husband replies ""Good. I'm not in the mood for fast food"""

"I asked my dad what the deadliest weapon known to man is. He said 'you came out of it'."

"I'm extremely terrified that Donald Trump might run this country..... I completely mean that."

"Today I fucked up... by being a power bottom"