134052

Joke of the Day

"Before I got divorced, I should have converted all my assets to jokes. Because my ex couldn't ever take one."

"What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? The first is a super hero, the second is a simple command."

"50 Cent released an album in Zimbabwe You probably haven't heard of it, because he debuted under the name ""Million Dollar Man"""

"What happens when a male prostitute trains another male prostitute? He takes him under his wang."

"""I just want to meet a nice guy."" -Girls who exclusively date assholes"

"Sam Adams is the main reason I know what season it is."

"I'm more afraid of the shitty music my family is going to play at my funeral than I am of dying."

"Why does Kanye West need a billion dollars for ideas? Ben Franklin discovered electricity with a kite."

"When people don't laugh at my jokes I just assume that they're not up to my level of comedy."

"Have you heard that Eskimos eat whale meat and blubber? Well, you'd blubber too if you had to eat whale meat."