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Joke of the Day
"The longest relationship I had was 10 days. Then she deflated."
Next Joke
"Stranger with a black eye is trying to talk to me. But I'm not going to respond cause it's pretty apparent she doesn't listen."
"My cat must hate his litter box He just shits all over it"
"Thinking about free healthcare and how much it's going to cost me?"
"Today a feminist asked me 'how I view lesbian relationships?' Apparently in HD wasn't the right answer.."
"If I lived in Gotham City I'd always be hinting I was Batman to get freebies. ""I'll get the bat-check. I mean regular check. Bat-thanks."""
"Marriage: Betting someone half your shit that you'll love them forever."
"""date night!"" = ""our relationship died a year ago!"""
"What do you call 99 bunnies walking forward and they take one step backwards? A receding hare line."
"What's the German guy say when you kick him in teh crotch? Oof, weinerpain!"