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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an eskimo peeping tom? Tom Tookalook. I'm sorry guys..."

"What do you call more than two English blokes masturbating? A Union Jack."

"The Department of Unfinished Statistics concluded... ... that 7 out of 10."

"*me, at high school prom Me: So, you wanna dance? Her: Definitely! M: Can you tell me why?"

"How do you make the Wicked Witch of the West kill herself? Challenge her to the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge."

"Chuck Norris doesn't go on the Internet, he has every Iinternet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking."

"What is Bruce Lee's favorite drink? WAAAAAAAAAATAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!"

"[family game night] Me: do u understand now, grandma? U understand the rules now? Mum [tappin my shoulder]: she gets it. Loosen the headlock"

"Why does KFC only sell christian chicken? Because the muslim ones are on the no-fry list."

"I do this amazing trick where I can erase every restaurant from your memory. Ready? Ok, here goes... ""Where should we go for dinner?"""