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Joke of the Day
"I've already accomplished* so much today *been afraid of a goose"
Next Joke
"How many guys in the Friendzone does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just stand around complimenting it then get pissed when it doesn't screw."
"Teacher: In what part of the world are the people most ignorant ? Pupil: Hong Kong Teacher: Why do you say that ? Pupil: That's where the atlas says the population is most dense !"
"I wanted to tell you a joke about my favourite Michael Jackson album but it's Bad"
"What do all Japanese Airmen wear eye patches? Because they're pirots!"
"What is the only correct answer to the question 'Are you ticklish?' I have explosive diarrhea."
"Drove my son to school only to realize there was a 2 hour late start. I should have dressed him warmer. He looked cold, sitting on the curb."
"What idiot called it jousting and not poker knight?"
"I read an actual newspaper today! For those of you who don't understand, a newspaper is like the Internet but made of paper."
"What is the only animal in the world that can't get hogh A fish"