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Joke of the Day
"I had explosive diarrhea On the bight side i started the year with a bang"
Next Joke
"ME: Who do you want to be at my Frozen-themed party? FRIEND: Let me be Olaf or Elsa ME: Ok but never threaten me in an Italian accent again"
"What has six eyes but cannot see? Three men in a house with dirty dishes in the sink, laundry that needs to be folded and kids that need a bath"
"When things are bad, remember: At least you're not as big an asshole as the guy who invented putting walnuts in chocolate chip cookies."
"""I have to inform you that you're sitting in an exit row and are legally required to take a photo of the plane wing and post it on Facebook"""
"How do you tell the difference between a Syrian hospital and an ISIS military base? I don't know either, Johnny, just fly the drone."
"I don't trust atoms. Because they make up everything"
"Chuck Norris has held the World Championship in every weight class at the same time."
"My doctor wrote me a prescription... It writes dailysex but my girlfriend insists it's dyslexia"
"Got asked to help unlock a PDF file today..... I said stop wasting your time, we should be concentrating on locking them up."