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Joke of the Day

"I had no shoes and I felt sorry for myself..... Then I met a man with no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better."

"Kid: ... Me: ... Kid: ... Me: ... Kid: ... Me: ... Kid: I just wanted to see you. [4:07 am]"

"It's 1942, Berlin. A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest walks out."

"Just had a kale and quinoa salad and now my name is Autumn and I braid my hair and drive a Subaru."

"This year I got my wife the Baking Bible for Christmas because last year I got her the Baking Quran, which really blew up in my face."

"Have you seen www.indecisive.com? Yes and no."

"My neighbourhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs I've been his customer for 6 years. I had no idea he was a barber."

"Two muffins bakes in an oven... Then one of them says "" Damn it's hot in here!"" Then the other screams... "" AAARGH!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!"""

"A cowboy goes to the barber. When the barber is done cutting his hair, the cowboy goes back outside. And guess what? Pony gone."

"What do you call it if you put an IED on an Italian? Rigatoni!"