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Joke of the Day
"What's E.T short for? Because he's got small legs"
Next Joke
"What's black and never works? DECAF YOU RACIST FUCK"
"TIL the USS Colorado made nearly 12,000 career dives during WWII- significantly more than most modern submarines- and sunk the last Japanese warship of the war! Sorry, wrong sub :("
"I think I missed the driver ed class on how inching forward every 5 seconds at a red light makes it turn green faster."
"The only folks who put them passwords on that fancy wi-fi internets is terrorists. This is Merica, land of the free."
"What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the batmobile? ""Get in the batmobile, Robin"""
"A Czech one: God is carrying a bag of dicks... ...when he suddenly trips over a rock and all the dicks fall out. He gets pissed off: ""I'm not going to pick them up, Prague's going to be here!"""
"You know that movie Anaconda? They filmed it in my pants."
"Native Americans are all pissed that we took their land when they were here first... ..but we made reservations."
"Why did the cannibal leave the restaurant? The waiter gave him the cold shoulder."