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Joke of the Day
"Monopoly I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly."
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"Told my mum someone had been shot and she asked with what? I wanted to reply 'with a cutlass' but I want her to pay for masters..."
"If you let Jesus take the wheel... Does that count as ghost riding the whip?"
"Writing is a great career when people like hearing what you have to say but don't want to look at you."
"What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water? Don't expect me to get hard in 3 minutes, I just got laid this morning."
"What four man rock group doesn't sing? Mount Rushmore"
"What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious"
"Fred: We had a burglary last night and they took everything except the soap and towels. Harry: The dirty crooks."
"I started seeing a psychic. I knew she was good because she told me she's voted best in the city 2017 and 2018."
"This is the story of a man named Jack. Jack was, well lets just say he was a repairman. One day while repairing the shingles on a rooftop, Jack got stuck. Will you help Jack off?"