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Joke of the Day

"Coming Out Girl: Dad Dad: yeah? Girl; I have Bad News Dad: What Is It Sweetie?? Girl: I'm A Lesbian... Dad: Ok... Other Sister: I'm Lesbian Too Dad: Does Anyone In This Family Like Boys!!! Son; I Do"

"How do you get your hair into shape? You condition it"

"What's the difference between your wife and your job? After five years your job will still suck"

"What do you get when you cross 400 Obese Water Buffalo with a Transgender Pimp? Clickbait"

"Me to 2yo: Hey bud, what are you having for breakfast? Sausage? Eggs? Hash browns? Oh... 8 forkfulls of ketchup? Good job!"

"How do we know a blind man created mermaids? He smelled the bottom half of a woman.."

"If marriage has taught me one thing in life, it's how to masturbate in bed without waking my wife up."

"Earlier I joked that Toronto was the capital of Canada. ""Joked"" being the operative word. Everyone knows only real countries have capitals."

"What do you call a very smart glass of lemonade that is gay? A homo-genius mixture"

"Fun Game: 1. Be a couple without kids. 2. Hire a babysitter. 3. When they show up and ask where the kid is, scream, ""You lost it already?!?"""