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Joke of the Day
"I feel like Pitbull is what happens when you give a shift supervisor at Aeropostale a record deal"
Next Joke
 
"I went to my highschool football coach's funeral.... When I got to the casket, I whispered, ""You walk it off asshole!"""
"What did a young Pink Panther sing when he was playing with his magnifying glass in the back yard? Dead ant; dead ant; dead ant dead ant dead ant..."
"Did you hear about the schizophrenic accounts manager? He couldn't help but hear invoices inside his head."
"My father would always tell me, ""Son, someday you will go far..."" ""and I hope to God that you stay there."""
"ME: *eating fast food* VEGAN GUY: You eat that stuff? ME: Yeah VG: That stuff is gonna kill you ME: *visibly annoyed* not soon enough"
"What do you pay a hooker with? Income."
"How do you piss off winnie the pooh? Stick 2 fingers in his honey."
"If banks are so worried about people stealing their pens, they should just attach them to a Creed CD"
"What's Irish and stays out all night? Patio furniture"