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Joke of the Day

"There is guy who knows most of secrets of the World That guy name is Mister-Lee [Mystery]"

"5yo: I dreamt I ate your brownie. Me: Wait, what happened to my brownie?? 5: Dreams come true."

"Life is like a penis. Simple, relaxed and hanging freely. It's the woman that make it hard."

"Why are Canadian Jews so poor? Because there are no pennies to pick up off the ground."

"If you run into someone you know and they say ""we should hang out sometime"" just say ""I'm ready to hang out right now"" and watch them panic"

"I have a friend. He keeps trying to convince me he's a compulsive liar, but I don't believe him."

"Cholesteroly? RT @kfc_colonel How would you describe KFC gravy in one word?"

"How is cunnilingus like riding a bike with an open face helmet? It's a lot of fun as long as you don't end up with bugs in your teeth."

"Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? If it had four, it'd be called a chicken sedan."

"mom, pull over imma bout to throw up... West side california!! wit uppppp"