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Joke of the Day

"Sad that at 36 I have yet to experience the dirty dancing lift. If it doesn't happen by 40 I'll just start running at random strangers."

"Where is the best place to find hot grills? A barbecue"

"What did the chronic masturbator say to his ex-girlfriend? I'm nuttin' without you."

"What can you say about lots of protected sex? It is a common misconception"

"What do you call someone who is sexually attracted to fish? Mer-curious"

"murderers are my pet peeve. im a real chill dude until i get murdered, then you better be prepared to have some sarcasm thrown your way"

"I'm addicted to soap But I'm clean now"

"Items that are made from velcro... Are such a rip-off."

"What do you call 222,215 Frenchman with their arms up? The active french armed forces."

"[wedding] i wrote my own vows *removes paper* ""chickety china the chinese chicken"" whoops wrong one *2nd paper* ""if i had $1,000,000"""