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Joke of the Day

"[cow pushing 5 shopping carts out of store] Ugh, why do I keep shopping for groceries on 4 empty stomachs"

"Why was Luke Skywalker banned from all the local pubs... He used excessive force"

"Teach a man to shake and he will be able to greet everyone. Give a man a shake and all the boys will come to his yard"

"Why was the circuit arrested? Because it was charged with battery!"

"I don't like damp things For the moist part"

"Why did the boy call 911 when his father ran a red light? He didn't want to go home early and do his homework!"

"Did you guys know that my son is a really big star? Yup, he's 1.989 x 10^30 kilos and has a diameter of 1.4 million kilometers."

"Why didn't the rope get any presents this year? He was very knotty."

"A square, a triangle and a hexagon walk into a bar, the bartender says ""Looks like you boys could use a round"""

"What is the mathematician's favorite pick-up line? Hey baby, wanna see the exponential growth of my natural log?"