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Joke of the Day

"Two condoms walk past a gay bar one turns to the other and says ""hey, wanna go in there and get shitfaced""?"

"Cool prank: Gradually remove a little bit of your mom's arm bones each night in her sleep until her arms are just totally floppy"

"I'm starting a new Egyptian fraternity, would you like to join? It's called Delta Delta Delta."

"How many Romans does it take to screw in a light bulb? V."

"(original) I just got my flu shot and tried to draw something, but it still looks shitty. I thought it was supposed to make me artistic?"

"""Don't let your inner child die!"" could be a slogan for an anti abortion campaign."

"I thought I saw Bradley Cooper but it was just every poem ever written formed into a beach sunset with amazing hair"

"Just started a new diet where I order Wendy's salad and then eat all my kids' fries."

"[pun] I wanted to be a personal trainer... But I was too scrawny and had to hand in my too weak notice. (Credits to Adrian, badass Chef)"

"What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings"