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Joke of the Day

"Hey do you know Deanda? Deanda dis dick!!! HA! Got EEEM!"

"What do you call a semi-professional proctologist? Someone doing a half-assed job."

"Why was the criminal's argumentative essay so good? He had some outstanding warrants."

"Me: who's a good dog? who's a good dog? Dog: i have a boyfriend"

"Why do gorillas have such big nostrils? Because they have big fingers! Not mine. Told to me by my late grandfather, funniest pastor ever. :)"

"Two cannibals are eating a clown One says to the other, ""Does this taste funny to you?"""

"I've just got back from a funeral of a friend who was killed after being hit in the head with a tennis ball. It was a lovely service."

"Why did the scare crow win the award? He was out standing in his field. This has Always been my favourite pun."

"How do you drown a hipster? In the mainstream"

"Gf: am I pretty or ugly? Bf: you're both hun :) Gf: what do you mean both? Bf: you're pretty ugly."