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Joke of the Day

"the average goat is 9 carrots tall if you measure goats in carrots"

"Walks into a Bar A man walked into a Florida bar with his crocodile and asked the bartender: ""Do you serve lawyers here?"" ""Sure."" ""Good. One beer for me and a lawyer for my crocodile."""

"Fixing my grandma's computer and I see that her search history is about seven various spellings of the name of the last guy I dated."

"what do you call it when 3 muppets have sex together? - Mena Menage a trois"

"Teacher: Are you good at math? Pupil: Yes and no Teacher: What do you mean? Pupil: Yes I'm no good at math!"

"""You can't sleep either?"" Says a voice from under your bed."

"Dear Genitals, Thank you for not bleeding every month. Sincerely, A Man"

"What does the Personal Computer and German people have in common? They're both the master race!"

"Did you ever realize that almond milk lasts four times longer than regular milk? That's nuts, right?"

"Me: Let's have a fight with that guy you like Brain: That's not a good idea, he might actually like y... Me: GOOD IDEA! WE ATTACK AT DAWN!"