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Joke of the Day

"You're psychiatrist's opinion about your social media habits don't count if he has less followers than you."

"Grandpa...why is there a suppository in your ear? Oh... THAT's where my hearing aid went!"

"Do cats stutter? No, but they paws."

"I want a girlfriend with OCD, that way whenever I want to go home I can just say ""Are you sure you checked the stove before we left?"""

"Hope the big twist in that new M. Night Shaymalan movie is that it doesn't suck."

"Why was Yoda afraid of seven? Because six seven eight."

"Turn yoga class into hot yoga by chasing everyone around with a blow torch."

"Did you hear about Michael Jackson's new album? It's called Invincible! *Sent using Microsoft Internet Explorer 6*"

"Why didn't the Romans try to kill Jesus after he rose from the dead? They were too afraid to double cross him."

"I just threw a snowball at a Smart car and its airbags deployed"