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Joke of the Day

"I tripped in front of Stephen Hawking. He lol'd."

"[Last Supper] Jesus:""We need 13 chairs please"" Judas:""But chairs don't fall into common usage until the 16th century AD"" Jesus:""AD?"""

"""We want people to wake up, but also want to kill themselves."" - Alarm Clock Sound Engineers"

"I'm thinking of going as a pimp for Halloween. Anybody know how the CEO of Wells Fargo dresses?"

"Why do a lot of math nerds wear glasses? It helps with division."

"First time I got high was pretty intense. I was in the back seat of my brothers car. Must have been some good shit since I'm an only child."

"There was a documentary on TV about the world's smallest car. I couldn't get into it."

"Funny Jokes testdfdfdfdfdfd"

"Imagine the PR nightmare if one of these pardoned turkeys goes on a killing spree."

"Virginity is curable."