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Joke of the Day

"Funny Lance Armstrong Joke I just heard that Lance Armstrong got his medals taken away from him for using drugs.. This is crazy because, when I do drugs.. I can't even find my bike."

"Hey guy driving the speed limit with your hands at 10 & 2, can I have some of that weed you're transporting?"

"DON'T shoot for the moon if you miss, you will land among the stars alone and asphyxiating"

"Ever since I've been on crutches I've been extremely depressed... I mean I just can't stand myself."

"Spilled yogurt on my shirt and now I can't stop thinking of selling shirts made of yogurt. The Yoshirt. I taste potential. And mixed berry."

"a white girl drowned today when her anchor tattoo pulled her to the bottom, sadly her infinity tattoo didnt mean she'd live forever"

"A Roman walks into a bar... And he holds up two fingers. ""Five beers, please,"" he asks."

"Some people say putting helium in animals is wrong, I say whatever floats your goat."

"My mom said she's going to dig a hole in the garden and fill it full of water.... ....she means well"

"What do you call the gingerbread man's ghetto cousin? The wonderbread man."