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Joke of the Day
"What's it like never being flaccid? Hard."
Next Joke
"You say ""kiss ass,"" I say ""rim job enthusiast."""
"Oh, you used ""whom"" in casual conversation. Well, I didn't realize I was in the presence of William Fucking Shakespeare."
"What idiot named it balding & not vanishing into thin hair."
"Every woman wants to be swept off her feet. It's when you put her in the trunk of your car that she starts to panic."
"Throwing pregnancy tests into the shopping carts of random couples at Walmart is the only silver lining in my day."
"My dad asked why i have a gun in my house Is said because of the decepticons, i laughed, my dad laughed, the toaster laughed, i shot the toaster, it was a good night."
"A portmanteau is when you combine 2 words to make 1 word. A great example of this is Groupon, a mixture of grey and poupon."
"Why did the bachelors purchase double amputee strippers for their party? Because they were 50% off!"
"What did Mick Jones say when he offended the Arabs sorry I'm a foreigner"